joke sms hindi chutkule

(1)

Punjab Me 1 Train Ke Niche 100 Sardar Aa Gaye!

99 Mar Gaye..

1 Bach Gaya.

Reporter Ne Usse Puchha: Ye Sab Kise Hua..?

Sardar: Galat Announcement Ki Vajah Se,

Announcement Huva Tha Ki Shatabdi Express Platform Par Aa Rahi Hai!

To Sab Ghabra Ke Platform Se Utarkar Patri Par Aa Gaye!

Par Train Platform Par Nahi Patri Par Aayi.

Reportr: Aur Aap Samajdar Nikle Jo Patri Par Nahi Utre!

Sardar: Are Nahi Re, Me To Suicide Karne Aya Tha, Announcement Sunke Me Patri Se Hatkar Platform Pe Let Gaya Tha.

(2)

BF: Kal Tumhare Ghar Gaya Tha.

Mujhe Nahi Lagta Hamari Shadi Hogi..!

GF: Kyu..?? Papa Se Mile??

BF: Nahi.. Tumhari Behen Se Mila..

Solid Lagti Hai..!!

(3)

Train Chali, Jetha Aaya Aur Dibbe Me Chad Gaya.

TT Bola – Q Be Dikhta Nahi, Ye Ladies Compart Hai.

Jetha – Sorry Sab, Mujhe Laga Aap Mard Ho…

(4)

Jetha: 1 Toothbrush Dena.

Meri Brush Ka 1 Baal Tut Gaya.

Dukandar: 1 Baal Tut Gaya To Naya Kyo Le Rahe Ho??

Jetha: Jo Tuta Wo Akhri Tha….

(5)

Ye Joke Padhoge To Haste Haste Pagal Ho Jaoge..

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Isiliye Nahi Bheja.

I Care For U Always..

(6)

Sharabi Road par Pada Tha,

Police man - Itni Kyu Piiee Rakhi He?

Sharabi - Majburi Thi Sir..

Police man - Kya Majburi Thi?

Sharabi - Botal Ka Dhakkan Gum Ho Gaya Tha..

(7)

Man: Koi Lambi Umar ka Tarika Batao.

Dr: Saadi kar Lo.

Man: Kya isse Umar Lambi ho jayegi!

Dr: Nahi ye Khwahis He Marr jayegi!

(8)

Profecer: Peheli Hindi Silent Film Konsi He?

Pappu: Agar Film Silent Thi To Apko Kaise Pata Chala K Wo Hindi He?

Profecer Shoked, Pappu Rocks..

(9)

Pappu: Yaar Achha Hua Main India Me Paida Hua, America Mein Nahi..

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Chintu: Q America Mein Paida Hota To Kya Ho Jata.. ??

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Pappu: Tu Bhi Na Yaar, Tujhe Pata to Hai Mujhe English Kaha Aati Hai..??

(10)

Ek Bar Engineering Ke Sabhi Professoron Ko

1 Plane Mein Bithaya Gaya..

Fir Announce Kiya Gaya Ki

“YE PLANE APKE STUDENTS NE BANAYA HAI”

Sab Profesrs Utar Gaye…

Par Principal Baithe Rahe

Logo Ne Pucha: Aapko Darr Nahi Lagta?

Principle: Muje Apne Students Par Pura Bharosa Hai.

Ye Start Hi Nahi Hoga!!

 (11)

1st Friend: Mere Pas Engineering Ki Degree He Kya Karu?

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2nd Friend: OLX Pe Bech De..

(12)

Zindagi Me Hamesha 1 Bat Yad Rakho,

Kisi K Dil Se Mat Khelo Kyunki..

DIL 1 Hi Hota Hai..

Agar Khelna Hai To..

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KIDNEY Se Khelo Wo 2 Hoti Hai..

(13)

Tanu: Yaar Mere Baal Bahot Girr Rahe Hain.

Manu: Par Kaise?

Tanu: Tension Se.

Manu: Kis Baat Ki Tension He?

Tanu: Baal Girne Ki.

(14)

Ek Sarder Ne Air-Hostess Se Kaha, “Aapki Shakal Meri Biwi Se Kafi Milti Hai”.

Air-Hostess Ne Ye Sunke Zordaar Thappad Uske Muh Pe Mara…

Sardar Fouran Bola: Aadat Bhi Bahut Milti Hai..

(15)

Pappu Nd Sardar Football Stadium Mein..

Pappu: Paji, Ye Log Ball Se Kya Kar Rahe Hai?

Santa : Goal Kar Rahe He..

Pappu: Lekin Paji, Ball To Pehle Se Hi Gol He,

Or Kitni Gol Karenge?

(16)

Pata Hai AAP ‘Chlormint’ Kyu Khati Ho..

Qki

5-Star

Cadbury

Perk

Dairymilk

Kit-Kat

Or

Munch

"50 Paise Me" Nahi Aati.

Haha

Ab Dubara Mat Puchna!

(17)

Sardar Ne Makhi Ke Pair Tod Diye Aur Kaha, Ja Udd Ja..

Lekin Makkhi Nahi Udi,

Sardar Ne Kaha: “Ab To Sabit Ho Gaya Ki Agar Makkhi Ke Pair Tod Diye Jaye

To Makkhi Sun Nahi Sakti..!”

(18)

Son (Phone Mein): Maa! Aaj Hum 2 Se 3 Ho Gaye.

Mother: Sabbash Beta! Ladka Huva Ya Ladki..??

Son: Nahi Maa! Tumhari Bahu Ne Dusri Shaadi Kar Li..

(19)

Sun Rahi Hai Na tu..!!

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 Girl: Nahi Re Sun, Sun Ke 'Behri’ Ho Gayi Hu Main...

(20)

Exam Me Examiner Bahut Strict Tha

Cheating Nahi Karne De Raha Tha.

1 Ladke Ne Chit Likh Kar Examiner Ko Di.

Examiner Chup Chap Ja Ke Apni Chair Pe Beth Gaya.

Sabne Us Ladke Ko Puchha: Yaar Tune Kya Likha?

Wo Ladke Ne Kaha - “SIR, Pichhe Se Aapki Pant Faati Hui Hai.

(21)

Sishya: Guruji,

Wife,

Biwi,

Patni,

Shrimati,

Aurat,

Ardhangini,

Gharwali

In Sab Me Kitna Fark He?

Guru: Vats,

Itna Mat Socho.

Musibat Ek, Naam Anek!

(22)

Ladkiwale -Humein Aisa Ladka Chaiye Jo Kuch Khata Pita Na Ho.

Pandit - Aisa Ladka To ICU Me Milega..